Perfect School

I glanced toward the kitchen and decided that the adults wanted their time together. So I went and sat on the floor with my back against an empty chair. I stared at the floor, trying to work through what Jonah had said. What was it I wanted?

Krissy:

Kira caught my gaze as she came out of the hallway. I took a moment to prepare a cup of tea. By now I knew (somewhat) what she liked. I took it over to her with Angel following at my heels. I crouched down.

“Here ya go. Dinner will be ready in a little bit.” I smiled and offered her the mug. I didn’t know, but I felt like something wasn’t right with her. Perhaps it was a newly budding maternal sense.

Looking up at Krissy was the first time I moved after sitting in the living room. “Thank you.” I took the cup from her and held it between both hands. The scalding warmth was a nice distraction from my head and the smell of the tea was heavenly.

Krissy:

I smiled. "You are most welcome." I patted her knee and stood up. I didn't think there was anything I could do to help her if she was going through something. If I had learned anything about my daughter, it was that she didn't open up easily. I saw Kira watching us and when I returned to the kitchen I brushed her hair with my hand and gave her a smile.

I dropped my gaze down to the mug in my hands. Slowly I tilted the mug, watching the dark liquid inside swirl around. Standing I took the cup with me. I slipped out the front door, taking Fluffy with me. Sitting on the porch I turned my gaze up to the stars. Clasping the mug between both hands I let out a sigh. "I hate this..."

Kyra:

I watched her go out through the back door. She wanted to be alone I was sure. I looked to Andrew. He shook his head no. I sighed and looked down at my lap for a minute. I got up then and followed her out. I could see Andrew shaking his head behind me, but I didn’t care.

“Hi,” I said when I closed the door behind me. She wouldn’t be pleased.

I watched the landscape, my untouched tea still held in my hands. Fluffy was curled around me and he lifted his head to peer at Kyra before laying back down and letting out a soft sigh. I glanced over my shoulder at her then motioned for her to join me. Telling her to go away wouldn't do any good so I resigned myself to my fate.

"Jonah is going to leave tonight." I figured the words would bring her some form of joy. And my voice didn't even hold any tone of accusation. If anything it showed tiredness.

Kyra:

“Good,” I said. I couldn’t hide that I wanted him gone. She knew it. There was no point in saying anything else on that matter. “I’m sorry I got angry at you. I was caught off guard and surprised. I am really glad that you’re here, Kira.”

I didn't answer at first. Instead I clutched my mug tighter between my hands. I glanced at her again and asked a question. A question that I had been pondering for a while now and one I hoped would help her see my point of view. "What's it like being able to make your own choices?"

Kyra:

I blinked in surprise. “What do you mean?” I asked in confusion. Kira often surprised me with her words. She kept so much hidden that it was impossible sometimes to tell where a thought had come from.

"I've never really had a chance to make a decision on my own before. A major one at least. I wouldn't count choosing what to eat at a restaurant." I finally took a sip of the tea and focused away from her. "So. What is it like making your own choices?"

Kyra:

I looked out at the barn. “I don’t really. Not on my own. I didn’t choose to go to the school. I didn’t choose to join Jonah’s team. Those choices were made for me. Every big choice that has come to me I haven’t made on my own. I get help, from my brother, my dad, my family. I can make my own choices on how to act, who to love, what to do. But Kira, you do that too.”

I shook my head. "I don't. Growing up for me I wore what I was told, I slept when I was told, I performed as I was told. The school was Marie's idea. I mentioned that Jonah was skilled and she decided to bring him under her control." I brought a knee up to my chest and hugged it. "I'm told how I must act, how I should feel, that love is forbidden. I am nothing but a doll to be played with and controlled and when I am set aside I am supposed to remain in the same state I was left in until I get picked up once more."

"The only thing I have had control over is what I can eat when I go out." I looked out over the land Michael and Krissy owned. "I haven't had the option of getting help with a choice. It is simply placed before me and someone else directs me through it."

Kyra:

“It doesn’t have to be like that. If you ask for help there are a number of people who would be willing and I’d be at the front of the line.” I looked at her with concern. “If you want out we can make that happen for you.” My voice was low when I said it. I knew I shouldn’t. It was too soon. She didn’t react well when others brought up Maire. But I couldn’t help feeling that she was starting down he path that would get her free.

I shook my head immediately. "That's not what I meant." I felt a twist in my stomach and any interest I had in drinking the tea went out the window. Now I just felt nauseous. I got like this anytime I thought about going against what Marie would want. I knew little tricks to get around it, but direct disapproval made me feel this way.

"I know you would help me if I asked...but if I wanted to take my time would you let me?" I fidgeted with the teacup. "I ask because I wanted to go slow. Go at my pace. Handle this..." I gestured back towards the house. "At my own speed."

Kyra:

I looked down. “Yeah, I know.” I shifted my feet on the steps. “I want what’s best for you. But if you say you want to move slowly, I can hold back. Just don’t move slowly that it slips by, okay?”

I looked at her. My lips parted for a moment to say what came to mind first, but I clamped them shut before anything escaped. Instead I looked forward again, "This is all new to me. And I'm still not sure I want it...there are so many rules being with people like family. They never teach you those rules."

Kyra:

“What rules do you mean?” I asked. I doubted Michael and Krissy had given her any rules. They are pretty laid back, even when we were kids. I brought my knees up to my chest. I was beginning to notice how cold it was outside.

"Honesty isn't always the right thing to do. People normally have feelings and things you say or do will hurt them." I closed my eyes and dropped my forehead onto my knee. Opening one eye I glanced over at her, "You don't have to stay outside with me."

Kyra:

“I want to,” I said and smiled slightly. “You know, that’s the best part about family, even if you do something that hurts them, they’re going to forgive you.” I copied her and laid my head on my knees. I had always wanted a sister.

I raised my head to look at her position then a faint smile cracked through the mask I usually wore. Placing my head back down I scooted over to bump my shoulder into hers. "I don't have any reason to need to forgive you yet. You've been...nice...far nicer than I think I'd have been in your shoes."

Kyra:

I couldn’t help but grin back at her. It was so rare that she smiled or even willingly touched another outside of sparring. “I try. I don’t always succeed, but I do try.” The door opened behind us and I turned to see my dad. He dropped a big blanked over the two of us then sat on my other side. “Krissy was worried the two of you would freeze to death,” he said. He nodded to Kira in greeting, casually as if she had always been here.

I nodded and was trying to think of something else to say when the door opened behind us. I glanced over my shoulder and stiffened slightly at seeing Kyle. He surprised me by dropping a blanket around our shoulders. Out of everyone in the family I was the most conflicted over him. I'd tried to kill him once. As an assassin that lingers. He was my first and only failed kill. And now like a taunting beacon he sat just feet from me as if he'd not a care in the world.

Kyra:

“Your moms used to slink off to together to have private conversations too when they were your age,” he said. I was surprised that he even mentioned Mom. He spoke of her so rarely. He looked at me with a sad sort of smile and patted my leg. “Dinner is ready if you’re done with your talk.”

Kira:

I looked away from him then nodded. "Alright." My mask settled back in place and I slid out from under the blanket. Stretching as I stood I started to head towards the door, only pausing long enough to gulp down the now cold tea before going inside.