University Roommates (Restart)

Emily:
"Well thats good that you have tonight off," I said. "Are you sure you dont wanna go inside and take a nap?" I asked. "When you wake up, I could make us something to eat," I added, hoping he wouldnt remember my tendency to burn everything I cooked.

Ashton:

"I can nap here," I said. I laid down and situated myself so that I was using her lap for my pillow. I knew I would need to eat, but I wasn't remotely hungry. "We don't have much in the way of ingredients. One can only have pancakes so often..." Pancakes were her go-to item to cook.

Emily:
I smiled softly and ran my fingers through his hair. "Okay, so then i'll order something later," I told him. "Try to get some sleep in the meantime," I said.

Ashton:

I enjoyed the feeling of her hands in my hair. The medication finally took over and I fell asleep with my head in her lap and an arm around her waist. it was much the same as it had been the night I was drunk.

Emily: 
I turned the TV on to a lower volume and settled in to relax for the duration of his nap. I kept running my fingers through his hair and got wrapped into a Harry Potter movie.

Ashton:

I slept through the whole movie and some time after. When I did wake up, I was groggy and my throbbing headache was back. I rolled to my back and looked up at her.

Emily:
I looked down when I felt him stir and pulled my glasses down my nose. "Hey sleepyhead," I said, softly. I had my laptop propped up on the arm of the couch with his head still in my lap. When the movie finished, I decided to get some writing done. "How are you feeling?" I asked.

Ashton:

"Better," I lied. I wound my arms around her waist more and held her. "What are you doing?" I asked, trying to look up at her screen. After the episode with her book, I was afraid to ask if she had worked on anything. That night I had taken the manuscript off the coffee table to keep her from throwing it away.

Emily:
"I have a deadline coming up for another children's book," I said. It might seem like writing a few pages for a children's book was easy, but usually, the editors wanted really specific stories and characters. There's a lot of revisions that go into it. I closed the laptop screen and looked down at him and pushed my glasses up on my head like a head band. "Are you hungry yet?" I asked him, trying to subtly feel his forehead for a fever. I knew he probably wasn't sick, but he looked it.

Ashton:

"I guess," I answered looking away from her for a moment before turning my gaze back to her face. I reached up and pressed a finger over a dark spot on her neck. I had seen it before but only now did it dawn on me that I had put the mark there. It was a good thing she hadn't been more willing last night or who knows what would have happened between the two of us. I dropped my hand down to my chest.

Emily:
I blushed a little at his acknowledging the mark on my neck. I knew and he knew that if he had been sober, I wouldn't have stopped him last night. But it did leave me feeling confused. I still didn't really know what all this meant. He was much more touchy than he ever was before but he made no move for anything more than that. He said he loved me but what did that mean? What was he going to do about it? "I can order whatever you want, "I told him.

Ashton:

"Get whatever sounds good to you. I'll eat anything," I said. I truly wasn't hungry, but I knew that I had to eat and that she would fuss if I didn't. "Anything except shrimp. Not a fan of shrimp," I added after a second thought.

Emily:
I smiled and nodded before gently shifting out of his grasp. I headed to the kitchen and opened the drawer with the menus. I thumbed through them before settling on a little place up the street who would deliver hot soup. I figured if his stomach was upset, it would be soothing. I ordered it and went back to the living room. "Do you need anything else?" I asked him. "Food should be here in a little bit,"I said.

Ashton:

I sat up after she left the couch and leaned my head against the back. "Just sit down here with me," I answered. She took the place of a drug for me. I wanted her with me without pause. I was afraid that if I was away from her for too long that I would start thinking about all the reasons why I shouldn't be with her.

Emily:
I did as he asked and sat down next to him. I reached over and gently touched his forehead. Maybe after he had something to eat, he would want an aspirin if he still had a headache. I didn't know if he was going to have withdrawal symptoms but i wanted to be ready if he did. "You're easy to please," I joked with a smile. "All you want to do is sit?" I asked.

Ashton:

“I just want to be here with you. Touching you.” I wound my arms around her and rested my head against her shoulder. I wanted to enjoy this time with her, even with the meth hangover. I couldn’t shake the feeling that this wouldn’t last. Something was going to go wrong sooner or later, whether she tried to deny it or not.

Emily:
I smiled and leaned down to place a small kiss on his head. "Okay, if this is what you want to do, I'm all for it," I said, running my fingers through his hair.

Ashton:

We spent much of the day like that on the couch. I ate some when the food came, but my appetite was no where to be found. Come bedtime, I went to take another long, very hot shower. I had come to a dilemma: what was I going to do with her now? I had spent the night in her bed while I was high, now that I was sober could I simply say good night and go to my own room? Would that hurt her?

Furthermore, we had more or less agreed on a relationship that was more than friendship, but we had not discussed the details. Presumably it was a more physical relationship, considering we had cuddled on the couch for the entire day, but we had done nothing more, besides a drug influenced hickey.

Did she want more? Did she expect more? I was still held back in my beliefs that I did not deserve to be happy with her and the fear that I was going to hurt her. Was it fair to ask for more than I already had?

I got out of the shower and dressed in pajamas. I took a couple allergy pills to help me fall asleep then returned to her in the living room. I had accomplished nothing more than worry during the shower.

Emily:
I was trying to clean up a little while he was in the shower. We had spent a lazy day on the couch and it showed in the apartment. I cleaned up our dishes from dinner and straightened the pillows on the couch. The coffee table was a mess so I took care of that too. By the time he got out of the shower, the place looked a little better. I smiled at him. "You look a little better," I said, hoping he felt a little better too. I was getting tired and I knew he must be too. I placed my hands on my hips and yawned as I stretched my back. "Its getting late, we should probably go to sleep," I said. It was occurring to me that I wasn't sure what the sleeping situation would be. Would he want his space now that we had spent all day together? Or would he want to be close? I figured, considering we hadn't even so much as kissed, much to my subtle frustration, sleeping in the same bed wasn't necessary. I stepped closer and moved in for a hug. "I'll see you in the morning?" I said, but it came out like a question.

Ashton:

Well. There was my answer. It was the right answer, but I couldn’t help but feel a bit of disappointment. I hugged her close and nuzzled her hair slightly. She smelled good, comforting in a way.

“Yeah, I’ll see you in the morning,” I confirmed. I wasn’t going to hide out in my room like I had done a dozen times before. I kissed her forehead tenderly released her.

Emily:
I smiled gave him playful wink before I turned around to go to my room. I climbed right into bed and pulled the covers up. I couldn't deny that I missed his arms after having them wrapped around me all day. But I fell asleep rather quickly regardless.

Ashton:

Even with the meds helping me sleep, I had a fitful night. I was awake early in the morning and took a long, hot shower. After that I got dressed and wandered outside. I remembered how my psychiatrist had gotten me to do something physical to help work through the cravings. Working out had always helped. I should have kept it up when I moved in here, rather than struggling with the cravings.

I went for a run in the neighborhood. People were just starting to leave for work. After one lap around the neighborhood, I felt out of shape. It was a decent run, but I was out of breath and tired. When I returned to the house I went straight to the kitchen to chug a glass of water.

Emily:
I woke up feeling refreshed but still a little sleepy. I dragged myself out of bed, my eyes still feeling a little heavy and my hair in a disheveled mess. I shuffled out into the living room and rubbed my eyes before looking at the noise coming from the kitchen. "You're up early" I said, my voice a little grumbly from sleep. "have you been out already?" I asked, looking for the time. Did I sleep in?

Ashton:

I looked up when she came in. “Yeah, I went for a jog around the neighborhood. I couldn’t stay in bed,” I answered with a shrug. I had been thinking about rehab and everything that got me there this morning. I hadn’t thought about where Emily and I stood, now that I had fully recovered from my hangover.

“How did you sleep?” I asked lamely, leaning against the counters.

Emily:
Once my eyes were fully open, I walked into the kitchen and grabbed my own glass. "I slept okay," I said with a half smile. I couldn't even fathom getting up to go for a run in the morning. I wasn't fully awake until at least noon. I stopped in front of him kiss his cheek, good morning. "You look a lot better. How are you feeling?" I asked as I walked past him to the fridge. I grabbed the juice and poured myself some.