University Roommates (Restart)

Ashton:

I had the sudden urge to scoop her into my arms and press my lips to hers when she kissed me on the cheek. Instead, I stayed leaning against the counters and followed her with my eyes. It was stupid really, but I believed that if I was giving in to being with her then I didn't deserve anything more than hugging her. I eyed the hickey on her neck. It was still dark.

Emily:
I closed the fridge and took a sip of my juice. When he still didn't answer, I looked at him with a raised eyebrow. He looked distracted. I smirked. "Ash?" I asked to get his attention. "What are you thinking so hard about?" I continued. He really did look better. Maybe a little tired still, but he didn't look sick anymore.

Ashton:

I blinked and focused on her face rather than her body. "I was thinking about my run," I lied. I turned around to refill my glass with water. "How about we go get breakfast? We could have someone else make us pancakes for a change." I turned to give her a half smile.

Emily:
I playfully glared at him and smiled. "I'll have you know that your sister loves my pancakes," I lied. I mean, I burnt them every time. I couldn't really blame her. "But, since I don't want to cook pancakes for someone so ungrateful..." I paused to point a finger at him. "Going out sounds nice," I finished. "I just have to get dressed. Give me like fifteen minutes," I said.

Ashton:

"Meet back here in fifteen then," I said with an amused smile at her speech. I went to shower off again since I was a little musky from my run. After dressing in fresh clothes, I combed my wet hair back and stared at myself in the foggy mirror.

I couldn't back out now, not after I had told her that I was in love with her. my goal now was to not screw up her life. I had to do everything I could to make her happy. I left the steamy bathroom and went to wait for her on the couch.

Emily:
I threw on some clothes and ran a brush through my hair. I kept my glasses on, too lazy to put in contacts. I laced up my sneakers before heading to the bathroom for a moment to brush my teeth and wash my face. When I was finished, I headed back to the living room. I stood behind him on the couch and smiled, reaching over to run my fingers through his hair. He had clearly just combed it after a shower...but I liked it better a little messy. "Ready?" I asked.

Ashton:

I tilted my head back to look at her.  There was a short pause before I nodded and stood up.  I laced fingers with hers as we went out to the car.  I hesitated again when I opened the car door for her.  There again was the overwhelming urge to kiss her.  I looked at the ground and stepped aside for her to get in.

Emily:
I frowned a little when he opened the door for me. He wasn't looking at me and he seemed almost awkward or uncomfortable around me. I was still holding his hand from when he grabbed it inside so I tugged on it gently so he would look at me. "Hey, is everything okay?" I asked. I didn't want to push it if nothing was wrong, but I needed to ask.

Ashton:

I looked up to meet her gaze. “Yeah. Just hungry,” I said with a half-smile but it didn’t touch my eyes. I lifted her hand up to my lips and kissed the back before letting go.

Emily:
"Okay, then lets go get you some food then," I said, smiling small. I got into the car and started buckling up my seatbelt. I wasn't totally convinced that it was nothing, but I figured if he wasn't pushing me away or hiding from me, it couldn't possibly be that bad. And if my hand was getting kisses, maybe soon, I would too.

Ashton:

Once I was in the driver’s seat I turned the radio on to ward off anymore question. I didn’t know why I couldn’t act like normal right now. I reached across and took hold of her hand again while I used my left to steer. My phone dinged as I was backing out of the driveway.

Emily:
I smiled over at him when he grabbed my hand and jumped a little when his phone made noise. "I hope that isn't your boss asking you to work," I said. "I could get used to having you home all day," I said, lacing our fingers together.

Ashton:

I paused out of the drive way and tilted the screen to see who it was. I sighed. “No, it’s Alicia,” I said without reading the message. I put the car in drive, trying not to think about the girl. She probably wanted to know if I was okay. It had been wrong of me to lead her on, essentially using her to get away from Emily.

Emily:
I bit my lip when he said her name and turned to look out the window. I had no reason to be jealous. But i was. When he left with her the other night, i had been hurt. And it was obvious she had a thing for him. Since i still wasnt totally sure where i stood with Ash, i couldnt deny the knot in my stomach.

Ashton:

There was no talking during the short drive, so I hummed along to the radio. When I parked, I let go of Emily's hand, pulled my phone up and checked the message. She wanted to know if I was alright since I hadn't come into work last night. I sent a quick message telling her that I was fine, and apologizing for the way I acted.

I looked over at Emily. "You alright?" I asked. She didn't exactly look happy.

Emily:
I looked over at him and nodded, although I wasn't sure how convincing it was. "Yeah, I'm fine," I said, putting my hand on the door handle. "Ready to go inside?" I asked. "Or do you need a minute?" I said, my voice taking on a slightly annoyed tone as I glanced towards his phone.

Ashton:

"No, I don't. Let's go," I said and got out of the car. I waited for her on the sidewalk but I didn't take her hand when she joined me. It always seemed that something went wrong when we went out together. Maybe our relationship was meant to be one where we only ever stayed in.

Emily:
When we got out of the car, I didn't say anything. He didn't grab my hand, which was noticeable after him holding it for the whole drive over. I walked into the resturant and since it was a weekday, it wasn't busy and we were seated right away. I bit my lip and fiddled with the menu for a second before just blurting out my thoughts. "I just don't like Alicia," I told him. He was with her when he took the drugs and he probably slept with her. She didn't seem like a good influence.

Ashton:

Looking up from the menu, I studied her face. "Okay," I said simply. I looked back down at the menu. How was I supposed to respond to that? “You don’t have to like her. There’s no reason to even think about her. I don’t.” I rarely talked to the girl unless I was at work and she came up to me.

Emily:
"You left with her that night." I said, wondering why he could pretend that meant nothing. I didn't want me jealousy to be so outright obvious so I just shook my head. "Never mind," I muttered, glancing back down at the menu. "I'm getting pancakes, what about you?"

Ashton:

"An omelet." I folded the menu and set it aside. "Does it bother you that she texted me? Do you want to see it? She was just asking how I was. She was worried because of what I did. She tried to talk me out of it, you know. She's not a bad person. But she's also not someone I really think about, so there's no reason for you to be bothered by it," I said and sighed. I leaned on the table with my elbow and rubbed my forehead.

Emily:
My face softened at his words and I shook my head. I reached across the table and grabbed the hand that was rubbing his forehead. "I guess I don't really know her well enough to make judgements like that," I admitted. "I'm sorry if I overreacted a little." I said. Yeah, it bothered me that she texted him but that was my fault. It wasn't his. The waiter came over to our table and I dropped his hand so we could order. When he left, I nudged my foot against his under the table and smiled. "Lets just forget I said anything"

Ashton:

I looked out the window near our table. "What exactly do you want this to be, Emily?" I asked without looking at her. Deciding what to do would probably be easier to determine if I knew what she wanted. I never knew.

Emily:
My smile dropped and I studied his face. "You know, I wish you would answer that question yourself because I'm really not in the mood to get rejected by you again." I said. He knew what I wanted when he read my book. And he certainly knew that if he had been sober the other night, I wouldn't have been pushing him away.

Ashton:

"Em..." I groaned quietly and turned to face her again. "I'm not rejecting you. I'm here with you now, I'm not pushing you away. I just, ahg..." I sighed and rubbed my face. "If you don't tell me what you want, how am I supposed to be that for you?"